Photos: Rebecca D'Angelo
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Fun Masters
By Priscilla Grant
55-plus Americans are happier today than ever before. Meet the men and women who seem to have found life's sweet spot, a balance of work and play that experts say is the key to happiness.
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We see you out there. You're the two-career couple who still manage to slip away for ski weekends and canoe trips. The retired schoolteacher who regularly dons an apron for exotic cooking classes. The businesswoman who stars in community theater musicals.
How do you do it? You've got just as many problems and responsibilities as anyone else. And you're not getting any younger, either. Yet somewhere in midlife, you caught a wave of pleasure you've been riding ever since.
 Stepping Out
Charlie Meade, NYC
Age 71
Former professional dancer, bus driver
"Now my time is mine. I get a certain high from dancing. It's playing. I seem to forget all my problems when I'm dancing"
One of the most eye-opening findings of a recent AARP MODERN MATURITY survey on enjoyment in life was that nearly 30 percent of Americans 55 and over say that the older they get, the more fun they have. The survey of more than 2,000 adults, conducted by RoperASW in July 2001 and January 2002, also found that another three in 10 report having the same amount of fun as earlier in life, while 34 percent say growing older means that they're having less fun.
The good news is there's hope for those who aren't natural-born funmasters. Members of the more-fun group aren't just lucky: They share attitudes and habits that everyone can learn from.
People who find joy in the second phase of life experience a "second growth," says sociologist William A. Sadler, author of The Third Age: Six Principles for Growth and Renewal After Forty (Perseus, 2000). He developed the concept during a 12-year study of midlifers. The findings of his long-term study challenge the stereotype that "starting in one's 40s, people have midlife crises or give up on their dreams and accommodate to loss," Sadler says. He found that a significant number of midlifers consciously began to take risks, continued to be productive, and increasingly enjoyed their relationships with those closest to them. In short, as the years went by life just kept getting better and better. "The oldest among them showed me that it's possible to experience and sustain renewal well beyond the conventional boundaries of old age," he says.
The AARP MODERN MATURITY survey confirmed that people who are having more fun also feel good about
themselves, enjoy close relationships, are intellectually curious, and are physically active. Compared with those whose fun times are on the wane, the more-fun group is more likely to feel
- happy (81 percent versus 53 percent)
- peaceful (66 percent versus 46 percent)
- truly alive (67 percent versus 44 percent)
- capable and competent (72 percent versus 59 percent)
According to the survey, the more-fun group is also more likely than their less-fun counterparts to
- socialize with friends (67 percent versus 49 percent)
- spend a romantic evening with a spouse or partner (35 percent versus 25 percent)
- exercise or play sports (49 percent versus 33 percent)
- do something educational or cultural (45 percent versus 31 percent)
- make love (40 percent versus 29 percent)
Those percentages may be rising. Sadler believes that because people are living longer than ever before, this second growth will one day be seen as the norm. The men and women in his study, he says, do not think in terms of retiring—certainly not in the old-fashioned sense of disengaging. "We have the potential for a 'third age' that our parents and grandparents didn't have," says Sadler. "We get this 30-year life bonus. People ask, 'Where am I going to put those years—if I put them in the middle, isn't that better than putting them at the end?'"
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